Wednesday, December 5, 2012

Love Letter

This is a Wicked Wednesday prompt (#want).  Please visit the site to check out everyone else's interpretation.

Love Letter 
When you come home,
I want you to take off all of your clothes and
slip into bed beside me.

When you touch me,
I want you to feel my love for you
pump its primal rhythm through my veins.

When you kiss my ready lips,
I want you to believe that I
need your arms to be my sanctuary.

When you push yourself inside of me,
I want you to release everything and 
let your concerns dissolve in our sweat.

When you reach the crescendo of pleasure,
I want you to open your eyes and really
look at what I become under your spell.

When you press your gaze,
I want you to see me -  as I
hold nothing back.

When you flick off the light,
I want you to embrace my whole body and
breathe softly into my neck.

When you rest your head on the pillow,
I want you to know that I could not
dream of a more worthy haven than this.

Tuesday, December 4, 2012

Sexual Fantasies

TMI TUESDAY - questions provided by Swinging Gemma.

1. Do you think that acting out a fantasy can sometimes cause damage to a relationship?

Yes.  We call them fantasies for a reason.  Some are harmless and might add a little spice to a relationship - for example:  having sex in the woods, adding a third or fourth person to the mix, masturbation via webcam.  But others can get us in to more trouble than they are worth and should probably stay in the bedroom and be used as pillow talk:  sex in the office, sex with a colleague or client or subordinate, sex with strangers.  And still others could be downright dangerous or illegal (though I realize that lots of perfectly normal sexual "desires" are considered illegal still in some states):  bestiality, pedophilia, necrophilia...

2. Some couples role play their fantasies rather than introducing another person into the relationship to live out their fantasies. Do you think that this is an acceptable substitute?

Absolutely.  If your partner is game and you've discussed it thoroughly and considered all the pros and cons, I don't see any reason not to try something - as long as it brings no harm to others.

3. Is there a particular movie or TV series or character from a movie or TV series that you fantasize about?

For years, it was Gary Oldman in the role of Dracula.  I'm a classic gothic romance fan, and he just really fit the bill for me on that one.  There's, of course, also Johnny Depp (I've had the hots for him since the original "21 Jumpstreet").  Hugh Jackman, Heath Ledger...

And let's not leave out the ladies - Julianna Margulies (looks almost just like my first girl-crush in college), Julianne Moore, Michelle Pfieffer, Marcia Cross...

Really, there are too many to cover in one post.  TV and film are crawling with hundreds of sexy people.

4. Apart from the obvious things like child abuse, are there some things that are ‘off limits’ for a fantasy e.g. incest fantasies, age play, rape fantasies. Why/ why not?

I have no problem with anyone living out a fantasy with other consenting adults.  Unless you are harming someone else or involving a person or animal that cannot speak for themselves, it's your business.  But, I personally take issue with infidelity.  I'm not judging others who do it, necessarily...but my marriage is so important to me.  If I wanted to cheat, it means there's a problem in the relationship that needs to be dealt with - or the relationship needs to end.  Mr. LL needs to be privy to what I'm doing with others sexually.  He needs to be in on the planning.  And right now...he even needs to be there - I do not play alone or without my husband's blessing.  All fantasies go through a process of discussion in our household long before they are ever acted upon.

5. What is the most taboo thing you have ever fantasized about doing?

I've had a few rape fantasies.

6. Tell us about a fantasy that you have that you don’t ever see yourself actually acting out. Why do you think you will never act it out?

Having sex with a his office.

Rape...  I think it scares me too much - I don't think I'd actually like it.  In fact, I don't really like it in my fantasies either, but it's there - so I suppose I have to admit it's a fantasy.

A gang bang.  Same as rape...I don't think I'd actually like it.  I can handle a partner...or most three - in an evening.  While my coochie is athletic and works out on a regular basis - she gets tired and angry if abused too much and for too long.  And she can be a spiteful little bitch.  Her revenge is unpleasant.

7. Have you ever pretended the person you were having sex with was someone else without telling them?

Yes.  Close eyes, insert face.  (Don't worry, Mr. LL...I haven't done it to least I don't think I have...)

8. Have you ever tried to make a fantasy a reality only to have it fail miserably? What happened?

Yes.  We have these friends...I will call them Dick and Jane.  I was hot for both Dick and Jane.  Mr. LL was good to go with Jane.  For some reason, every time we drank a bit too much when we were together, Jane and I ended up getting handsy and kissy (it happened way more than once, so you know there was more to it than just the alcohol).  Then, I began to try to seduce her to go further.  Dick was totally up for it.  Jane, not so much.  I think she was willing to do the girl on girl thing but wanted nothing to do with swinging or letting me anywhere near Dick (and believe me, there were a few moments when I really considered fucking him anyway - oh good lord how it took all of my self control, when I ran into him outside of the cabin we were all staying in, to say "No, not without her blessing").  Over the course of 3 separate interactions, we finally gave up.  It ended with a drunken evening of kissing and fucking on the same bed (our own trading...but there was some touching going on - and I'm pretty sure Mr. LL got his face between her legs at some point.)  We're still friendly with them both.  But, I have to admit I'm still a little bitter about the failure.  Dick was so into it, and I would have really enjoyed fucking him.  As of now, when we do see them, it's like it never happened.  But then, we avoid going anywhere with them where alcohol will be involved (they are both crazy-makers - they bring drama where ever they go).  Put a little wine in that woman and she gets all handsy and flirtatious.  It sort of pisses me off a tad, actually.  Makes me want to say..."Don't offer anything you aren't willing to go through with."  Grrr....

Bonus: Tell us about your most cherished fantasy. Did you ever live it out? Please give us all the juicy details because that is the kind of people we are.

I don't really know that I have a "cherished" fantasy.  I guess, for many years I fantasized about being with a woman.  I had a huge crush an a girl in college.  I was in a relationship at the time, though it was caving in.  I sort of chalked my desire up to being unhappy with my boyfriend.  But....the desires didn't go away.  It was awhile before I had another full-on girl crush.  I never went through with that one.  She
was a waitress at a local restaurant that I loved.  She had this really curvy figure, like I love.  Almost a bit plump...I suppose you'd call it voluptuous...this round, enticing bottom that she always covered in form-fitting skirts and dresses.  And she always wore heels and classic jewelry...lots of black and white and red.  But she was "crazy" and would have led me down the path to ruin, I'm sure.  What is it with my fascination for crazy chics?

Here are some links to a story (written in parts) that was inspired by this pretty little lunatic.

I think right now, my fantasies lean toward the "man dominating the woman" side of things.  I love it when my husband takes control.  When a man who I know respects me takes the lead sexually and uses his power to control the situation (without pain), it makes me cum buckets.  Okay...that wasn't a lady-like description, but you get the point.
And I thought...just for the entertainment factor, I'd add this this gem on.  Wow. I don't even know what to say. Maybe you do. I mean, there are a few good points here, but they're drowned out by all of the completely sexist commentary.  Yowsa! I guess it doesn't help, either, that I'm not Christian. So, I have a hard time with the - God wants me to do this/not do this - mentality when it comes to sex and marriage.  I love my husband. I married him because I wanted to spend my life figuring shit out...with him by my side to help make everything seem less confusing...or at least less lonely. Sure, I have spiritual beliefs...but they don't belong in my bed.  And if I ever left him for another man - I sure as hell wouldn't expect him to be waiting around for me when I finally got my head out of my ass. Who the hell is this woman married to? And who the hell are these people?  And last, but not the hell did I find this stupid video in the first place - Google is a strange guide, I must say.

Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Judging others' sexual proclivity is objectionable

This week's prompt is:

followed by this statement:

Some time ago Molly from Molly’s Daily Kiss and Sinful Sunday collaborated with Wubbs for the Breast Cancer Awareness month. Wubbs has approached me about spreading the cancer awareness during Movember. And of course, I definitely wanted to help. I let Wubbs speak:
We are coming to the end of Movember. Thousands of men around the world have spent the last month growing a moustache and now they will be considering: do I keep it or shave it? Movember is a month long awareness campaign to highlight men’s health issues, among them prostate cancer.
Any positive awareness is a good thing. My collaboration with Molly and the Sinful Sunday meme for Breast Cancer Awareness was such a big success that I asked Marie, if she would be interested in collaborating with the If Just One Person Reads This cancer awareness project that I run. Once again someone will question why? I will always answer why not?
Use this prompt as you would normally, this isn’t a prompt to write about cancer. Have fun with it!
All participants of this week will be linked on the pimps page on Wubbs’s site. If you have a blog button, please make this known in your blog post, so Wubbs can copy it and place it on her site. If you do not have a blog button but would like to make one, then go to the Grab My Button generator. It works like a charm!
Let us know how you were inspired, tell us your stories. Help us spread the word about cancer awareness.
Add the Wicked Wednesday button, post on your blog and come back here between late Tuesday evening and early Thursday morning (Western European time) to link your post on the Wicked Wednesday Entries page.
Thank you for participating and don’t forget to visit the other entries too!

To tell you the honest truth, I'm not completely sure what to say about this I am going to write myself into a corner and stay there until I can behave.  It could be a long night...really.


I must ask you a question,
but I'll save it for later,
after the last whispered mention
of the unrepentant satyr

has lifted into the air -
a dizzying array of rumors,
half-truths, but who cares?
Certainly not the whores

who hang suspended from his arms
like cheap costume jewelry -
a lipsticked collection of plastic charms,
fishnets and hairsprayed foolery.

They laugh as loud as his money talks,
smiling and licking their lips,
fingering his cuff-links and teasing his cock,
shifting their breasts and exaggerated hips.

He smiles too wide, exposing teeth
the size of dimes, an overdone black moustache
puffed up above his lips - underneath
an intrusive nose that seemed to bleed cash.

Their dresses, several sizes too small
and his suit, several sizes too big
look ridiculous, like caricatures or dolls
being sold like suckling pigs.

In their heels, the tower above him,
looking down at his greasy parted hair,
their hyena cackles and glassy eyes dimmed
by too much wine and not enough care.

The longer we look at him and his hired entourage,
the less we linger on ourselves.
So easy to let our own egos be massaged
by the widening cracks in his image.

He dances, sandwiched between three women,
to a rhythm that doesn't match the music.
His face contorts into a pained smile, like a sucked lemon,
and he moves with tremors and ticks.

Others watch, sneers plastered
on their high-boned faces,
eyebrows raised above eyes that have mastered
incredulous judgement.

Do any of them realize that he doesn't give a shit?
Or that it isn't anyone's business who he pays
or who he fucks?  None of us need a permit to submit
to our desires or indulge a wayward gaze.

So easy to look down on those who feed lust,
open their legs and welcome it,
fasten it to their thighs and bust
at the seams to keep it.

So much more difficult to admit our own needs,
in the beginning, before we risk everything
to become truly human, and bleed
the virginal truth of our very being.

He presses his ass into each juicy thigh
and purrs audibly as they stroke his pinstriped
cliche of a suit.  The onlookers try
to hide their sneers behind crystal and wine.

Inside, every one of them wishes they could be
that unencumbered by reputation, that unaware,
that naively, blissfully free,
totally and utterly without care.

In their perfect suits and sequined gowns,
glued to their chairs for fear of appearance,
they swallow their own sharp misfortune -
the burden of coherence.

Let me ask, before the music stops
and the coats are retrieved,
as you place your hand on top
of mine:  Do you believe me

when I say, I would rather be him,
in cheap polyester, wild-eyed
and sallow-cheeked, than them,
bound by simulated perfection.

So, I have to say...that was hard.  And I'm not sure how I feel about it.  I sat down with a prompt that really left me hanging.  I took a swing.  Maybe I missed? was painful.

Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Our sex was famous, but I forgot your name... (TMI Tuesday)


1. Have you ever had sex with someone famous or who later became famous, if only locally?

I almost had sex with a very well-known professor when I was in college.  He was an actor in local productions and I had been in several of his classes (he was one of those amazingly passionate coked-out pedagogues who'd stand on desks reciting Kubla Khan - dissecting all of its sexual imagery in gory detail - moistening my thighs with every word and gesture).  I was at a cast party at his house (with my boyfriend).  I headed off to the bathroom; the door stop was a woman with her legs spread around the door.  I smiled, moved her out of the way, and forgot to lock the door.  He walked in right as I was zipping my pants.  He moved in to kiss me...and suddenly the spark that seemed so amazingly bright vanished.  The unattainable had suddenly become a pathetic old man in my head.  Total bummer...really.  And I HAVE, indeed, forgotten Professor What-his-name's name.

Sylvia Plath

2. In the spirit of Six Degrees of Separation, have you had sex with someone who had sex with someone who had sex with someone who . . . someone famous?

Well, probably.  But, I don't KNOW about it.  Besides, if I did, I might be jealous.

3. In the opposite direction, have you had sex with someone whose name you didn’t know?

I've always known their name at the time.  But, I'm terrible with names and am likely to forget them as soon as I'm introduced.  It isn't their fault I forget.  I don't think I've forgotten a fuck yet.  So, at least their penises (and vaginas) are memorable.  I mean, really, the only one I HAVE to remember is Mr. LL's.  And the few special people I fuck on a recurrent basis.  Once I have an emotional connection, I'm much less likely to forget.  But once the tie is broken, I make no promises.  No matter how good of a lay someone is.

4. Someone whose name you knew then but have forgotten?

Oy vey!  Yes, indeed.  In, fact...there are a few.  Once I hit 25, scorned and licking my wounds after a 5-year-long, dead-end, waste of a relationship, I decided to become everything I hated about men.  One-night stands, cruel send-offs, no respresponsibility, and less connection.  So there are a few guys that got stuck in that vortex - faces I vaguely remember, but names that have gone the way of the tide.  A guy I noticed in a pub - took home and never called again...maybe it was Vincent or Vinnie or Vaughn?  And another who had a penis the size of my little finger.  I'll give him a little credit and say it swelled to the size of my middle finger when it was hard, but it was the one and only time that I heartlessly kicked a guy out of my house without any explanation other than, "I'm not about to resign myself to a whole night of pretending to enjoy this."  There was another guy who banged on my door in the middle of the night, drunker than hell, professing his undying love for me after I'd told him I was finished.  When I told him I was calling the cops, he threw the empty bottle at my front door and disappeared...forever.  And there have been a few swinger "name casualties".  Hell, it's dark, there are naked people...I can't remember them all for god's sake.

5. Someone who you suspect may have forgotten you?

Oh, sure.  I mean, I'm good at what I do, but it's my mouth or my body or my cunt they'll remember.  Not my name.  If I even gave/give them a real one.  It doesn't hurt my feelings a bit....Now the time Mr. LL called me by his ex-g.f.'s name after sex?  That landed his ass on the couch.  In fact...he relegated himself there before I could even kick him out.  Of course, that was VERY early on in our relationship, so no hard feelings.  It's funnier than it is anything else, because it could happen to anyone, and it meant nothing.

Bonus question: Someone you wish you could forget?

Yes...that guy I told you about above...the one with the pinkie-sized dick.  And there was this guy in high school.  I went down on him under a blanket between the bed and the wall in a crowded hotel room when I was 16.  I'd be cool with letting that one out of my memory.  Shit, the stupid things we do when we're young and desperate to be accepted.  And...he was my ex-boyfriend's best friend.  I know - right?  And there was the guy who I dated who got hooked on meth (even though he was also on anti-psychotics) who took what wasn't offered on the bed of his VW microbus.  I could forget that moment - though I honestly don't hold it against the guy.  Drugs do terrible things to people.

But, honestly...pretty much all of my sexual experiences are a necessary part of who I am as a sexual being.  If it weren't for them, I wouldn't be who I am or do what I do today.  So, I guess I don't really want to forget any of them.  Besides, they provide me with a laugh (to myself) from time to time.

Friday, November 23, 2012

Wearing Nothing but His Socks

She had her hands in the dirty dishwater when he came flying around the corner wearing nothing but his socks, his hair disheveled, and his face unshaven.

"He's outside! the bedroom!"

"What?!"  she feigned shock, but her naughty smile betrayed her.  Since they'd had kids, "quickies" were definitely where it was at.  They'd tried all kinds of possible places (yes, even the closet), and had been interrupted more than a few times, which was part of the intrigue - they could be caught with their pants down, at any moment.

The difference between a quickie and regular sex was that there was never time for foreplay, no time to undress, no time to think about all the reasons that they shouldn't.

"He's out there with friends...what if he brings them in?" she offered the concern, but knew he was already beyond worrying.  No time.

He grabbed her around the waist, pulled her to the bedroom, and locked the door.  Her cotton lounge pants were hardly an impediment to his searching, as he pulled them down around her ankles and pushed her over the bed, which, handily, was the perfect height for it.  Down on one knee, without romance or a ring, he slid his finger from the crack of her ass, across her puckered asshole, between her lips, and stopped at her clit.  With two hands, he spread her open and licked her to wetness - nothing that could really be called foreplay...really just a fast way to lubricate her.

She listened carefully for the front door, but it was hard to concentrate with his tongue where it was.  And when he stood, and eased his dick into her from behind, she lost her sense of hearing.  Completely deaf, she pushed her ass into him, urging him to go faster.

His hands held tight to the handles created by her position, pulling her to him with each thrust.  She grabbed hold of the quilt and bit it hard, suppressing her verbal reactions.  She was already dripping her own wetness down the inside of one thigh.

He pulled out briefly to turn her over her, still right at the edge so he could remain standing.  He liked the view of her tits bouncing under the tight white t-shirt.  Even in a bra, he could envision the pink nipples pointing at the ceiling.  And he knew he could bring her to instant orgasm this way.  Her feet resting on his shoulders, his palm on her clit, rubbing vigorously in a circular motion, his dick pumping into her pussy.  He could always tell when she was close:  the arched back, the beautifully pained look on her face, her fists clenching whatever they could reach, and all of her lower muscles contracted.  And when she came, he couldn't help but follow.  Just the rhythmic tightening of her pussy was enough to send him over the edge.  And when he gushed his hot cum into her, she came again.  She loved the feeling of him warming her from the inside out...little tendrils of heat moving up her belly, across her chest, around her neck, and settling in her cheeks.  That "freshly fucked" blush of utter contentment.


In unison, they both said, "Oh, shit!" and instantly separated, scurrying to find proper cover.  She grabbed a pair of underwear, hoping to contain the liquid trying so hard to come back out the way it went in; he ran for his robe.

Unlocking the door and peeking her head out, she yelled back down, "What do you need?!"

"James wants to know if I can go to his house for lunch!"

She didn't even think it through...."Yes!  Yes you can!"

Traipsing into the bathroom, she slipped her hands inside his robe, "Looks like we're going to get a little more time on this one..."

She dropped to one knee, without romance or a ring, and took his mostly hard penis into her mouth.

Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Wicked Wednesday: Afternoon in the Park (fiction)

Afternoon in the Park
a story inspired by the Wicked Wednesday prompt above....

The cold, wet air felt good in her lungs as she ran down her driveway and turned left, following the perfect suburban sidewalk all the way to the park.  Her smooth, bare legs bristled with goosebumps, but she knew her body would heat from the inside out with the constant strumming of her feet on the pavement.

There had been a wild storm earlier, and the ground was wet.  She ran around puddles and splashed through patches of grass, until she reached the trail she was aiming for.  Her headphones pumped music into her ears and magnified the sound of her breathing and her heartbeat, as if her ears were clogged.  It made the music sound far away at times, when she focused in on her internal rhythms.

She didn't see him, crouched behind the bushes ahead, but he certainly saw her.  In fact, he saw her on most of her runs.  He watched her from a distance, followed...waited.  Maybe today would be the day.  Maybe he'd have the balls to jump out, grab her from behind, silence her with his gloved hand, and drag her into the bushes.  She'd fight.  Hell yes, she'd fight.  Probably bite a hole right through the leather.  He could see the muscles dancing in her thighs, the slight hollows in her cheeks as she sucked in cold air.  When she released her breath, it left a smoke trail behind her.

His dick started to twitch to life.  Fuck.  He felt wild with indecision as she moved closer and closer.  If he was going to do it, he had no choice but to strike now.  Now.  Now!

The second she passed him, he flew from his camouflaged position, grabbed her from behind, wrapping his arms around hers to keep her from swinging her fists.  His next move was to clamp his hand over her lips, grabbing hold of her face and squeezing in order to keep her mouth closed.

He picked her up off her feet, bending backwards to stabilize himself as she flailed her legs wildly.  Behind the cover of dripping foliage, he threw his weight on top of her.

"If you scream, bitch, I will slit your throat, here and now."  He breathed it into her ears through clenched teeth, a stinging whispered order.  In his euphoria, pupils dilated, eyes wide with a crazed, singular motivation, he jammed his knees between hers, ripped the thin fabric of her running shorts, pushed aside the crotch of her panties and plunged his dick into her clenched pussy.

He almost came on contact.  But he willed himself to hold it in for at least a few ecstatic thrusts.  He had waited too long to let it go so quickly.  He wanted to savor her rigid body, and his complete and utter control of it.  Pushing so hard into her, he grunted with effort and release.  And when the climax actually came, a rush of fluid bubbling up from his balls, he could feel the pressure building all the way down his the head...and into her hot, wet cunt.

"You like that, don't you?"  He heaved the words into the side of her face. "That's what you wanted..."  "You've been asking for it for years, and now, you've gotten what you deserved.  Prancing around the neighborhood in those tight little shorts, wagging your behind and those pert little breasts bouncing with each footfall."

Her body went slack and he released her face.


He rolled her over and looked at her face.

"Yes.  And I can't believe you did it!  You scared the absolute shit out of me, you fucker!"

She laughed out loud, breathless and wild-eyed, smiling like she'd lost her mind.

"Fuck, Aidan.  I really didn't think you had it in you...holy shit!"

"Did it live up to your expectations?" he asked, smiling, a bit sheepishly.

"Holy shit.." was all she could reply.

"I brought you some extra clothes."  He gestured at a black canvas bag on the ground nearby.

"Didn't figure you'd care to prance back through the neighborhood in ripped shorts."  He grinned.  And she put her arms around him and kissed him hard.

"You are so getting fucked tonight.  Holy hell, what got into you?  I've never seen you with so much...fuck...I don't know what to call it...shit that was hot..."

"So, do I get an A for a first attempt?"

"You get an F...for holy fuck, baby..."

(Disclaimer - while I may have had a few strands of "rape fantasy" run through my head from time to time - hey, I like the power dynamic, what can I say - I would never condone rape, nor would I really wish to have this particular scenario played out in my own life.  But, when I read the quote for today, I thought "wild" finds "wild"...untamed...something a little different in my writing repertoire.  And so, here you have it.)

Sunday, November 18, 2012

Tattoos (fiction)

All I have to do is look at a different part of his body when he's on top of me, and it's like I'm fucking someone, or something, new every time.

A multi-colored serpent winds itself around his left arm and hangs over his shoulder, resting it's scaly head on his color bone. It's eyes, like a jealous woman, taunt me. It silently claims a part of him, but right now, so do I. My teeth leave an imprint on the serpent's face, a jagged, semi-permanent reminder of our confrontation, and my victory.

I roll him onto his back, taking charge in the way that he likes. The sort of power he lets me have. He thinks it's cute when I run the show. It turns him on. Straddling his hips, I feel like I've been impaled on his massive dick - the kind of phallus that requires forethought, a relaxed cunt, and lots of lube. Rocking very slowly back and forth, easing myself into a more pleasurable state of existence, I run my fingers across his naked chest. There's a tribal mask on his right pectoral muscle. 5 inches of angry African voodoo staring me in the face, it's red eyes dancing with each of my lover's breaths. I put my hand directly over it, letting it peek through my fingers. I want it to watch me as I fuck him. I want it to know who I am, as I suffocate it with my entire weight.

I pull myself upward and off of his erect and swollen shaft, lean on one knee and dismount. Turning my body around and re-straddling, I kiss his lips with my pussy. If it could purr, it would...when he places each hand on an ass cheek, gripping them like basketballs in his palms, spreads them, and licks me from front to back like a sticky lollipop. An octopus wraps itself around his left thigh, sneaking in between his legs, and up on to hollow of his pelvis. Two, small yellow eyes gleam from the sides of its head, bobbing up and down and swaying with the current of his muscles, as they tighten and relax. I kiss the tip of all 8 tentacles, from his pelvic bone to the inside of his thigh.
It's a constant battle between psyche and art. May this war last an eternity.

"Man with an Octopus Tattoo II" (2011) by Richard Learoyd. This life-sized nude photograph has a pose similar to that of works by Ingres. Photographer: Richard Learoyd/McKee Gallery New York/National Gallery via Bloomberg

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

One drink away from your first kiss with another girl

So once, at a swingers meet and greet, a guy told me that every woman is just a few drinks away from her first kiss with another girl.

Hmmm...I'm not sure if that is true, really (maybe it was just his "hope" talking).  It certainly was for me.  But, for others?  I refuse to presume what others want or don't want...but in my opinion, we're all pretty fluid, if we are truly honest with ourselves.

Honestly, I think society (nurture) has had a greater impact on our psyches than (nature), which seems to get beaten out of us at every turn.  We're told exactly what to think, how to feel, what to believe, who to love, who to trust, who to stay away from.  And interestingly, we still have addiction, behavioral and mental disorders, and people act outside the "cultural norm" all the time - even when punishment for it is imminent.

Can't fit yourself into the main stream - one-on-one - man and wife - nuclear family with a two-car garage, 2 1/2 kids, and a dog - stereotype?  Don't worry, very few of us (if any) can.  Taking a virtual walk down the aisles of the personal ads on Craigslist; you'll see a never ending supply of people seeking "something else", something "new", something "dangerous" or "naughty".  Married men offering to suck cock, women looking for gang-bangs or hoping to fulfill rape fantasies with a stranger, couples looking for a single woman or man, men asking for used underwear....all with the promise and request of complete discretion.  You name it - there is a fetish for every day of the year, and hundreds of people to revel in each one.

There is no way to judge another without first judging ourselves.  So, really, it's best to avoid it.  If no one is being harmed (i.e. everyone involved is a consenting adult) really shouldn't matter to anyone...and the more it matters to a person, the more likely it is that transference is the real problem.

I don't like to call myself anything.  I'm not really bi-sexual...because I don't have sex with women on a regular basis, and I prefer men.  I'm not really a swinger...because I haven't really committed to the "lifestyle".  I do what I want, when I want.  Hot chic?  I'll fuck her.  Sexy group of couples, I'm in!  Sexy time alone with my one-and-only?  Absolutely...he's my soul mate; that's why I said, "I do."  And I can truly say that I am thankful to have such an open, honest relationship where we can discuss ALL of our desires - even if they make us feel uncomfortable or embarrassed.

Labels are almost always inaccurate, and they tend to not only categorize us unfairly, but they also sometimes make us feel or act a certain way that we might not without them.  I don't like to be pigeon-holed.  And I don't like feeling guilty for natural desires (and really, all desires are natural - as we are all produced by nature)...whether they are right or wrong or not - well, that is a personal decision).

To is a feeling - pure sensation.  As is love.  Neither can really, fully be explained...nor should it.  There is a certain magic in not being able to define humanity.  There is wonder in not knowing.  Best to just live life, enjoy the opportunities when they present themselves, and stop questioning so much whether it's right or wrong. 


Monday, November 12, 2012

Masturbating in the Shower

On my back in the bed,
legs splayed lazily,
my breathing was slowing down.

A liquid mix of us
dripped between my cheeks,
tickling my backdoor.

It was such a good afternoon fuck.

You dressed and headed back
out to the kitchen or the couch
so I could shower.

I stood slowly, letting the come
make lines down the insides of both thighs,
squeezing my muscles to encourage its release.

I put my hand between my legs,
cupping my entire pussy
to feel the wet heat,

sliding one finger in to feel
the swollen sides and the slickness
you left behind.

In the shower, I couldn't help it.
The come all over my hands,
I stuck two, then three fingers inside.

On my toes, holding on to the wall,
my thighs and calves clenched, fingers
squeezed tight, but not immobile...

small movements, for a few minutes,
and a quick, biting orgasm,
led to a final gush of fluid.

The water was hot,
and the fan muffled my cries,
as I nearly collapsed.

And no one heard a thing.

Hot, unplanned sex in the middle of the day when it shouldn't be possible is a blessing that should not be taken for granted.  Especially for those of us with children.  It must be fast, and furious, and may be interrupted at any stage of the game.  Maybe that's what makes it good.  Masturbating in the shower is must be quick, and you have to be quiet, and someone might just walk in on you.  I know, I know, lock the door...but what's the fun in that?

Saturday, November 10, 2012

The Sensualist - a tale of massage...with a twist

A long time ago I read Diane Ackerman's A Natural History of the Senses.  While reading it, I learned that each of us is ruled more by one sense than all the others.  For some of us, smells elicit the strongest emotional and primal reactions.  For others, it is purely visual...or auditory.  For me, it is touch.  Blindfold me and let your fingers lead the conversation - that would be my choice, above all other things.  Sweet nothings in my ear are nice, a beautiful smile is a turn on, the taste of salt on skin is enticing, and the smell of cologne can be intoxicating...but I will take touch any day of the week.

This is why, today, I am thankful for massage.  I try to go at least once a month, for my mental and physical well-being.  But, it's hard, when you're a deeply sexual being, not to derive at least some sensual pleasure from being naked in the room with another human, indulging in skin-to-skin contact.

The lavender chamomile massage oil, the soft music, the dark room, the pretty girl with glasses whose hands warm and soothe my muscles.  It's amazing to me that not every single person on the planet takes advantage of this.

I go mainly for my back, but since it is always offered, I take the full-body massage.  And I've had enough different massage therapists that I've learned to appreciate the ones who have fewer "boundaries", so to speak.  And I wonder, if just maybe, they sometimes have the same feeling...that tingle of interest as their hands slide, palms open, across the small of a person's back.

The majority of my stress sets up shop between my shoulder blades and at the sacrum, where sciatica is an unwelcome, occasional guest.  Since that has begun to happen, painful knots have been growing in places too intimate for a massage therapist to attempt on their own.

But what if...

I walked into the dim room, removed my clothes, and slipped under the soft flannel sheet and smoky blue down comforter.  Face down, I eased myself into a comfortable position, placed my hands at my side and waited.  When she returned, tapping softly on the door to alert me to her presence, she said nothing.  With my eyes closed, I could hear the tiny clank of bottles and her hands rubbing together, slippery, heating the oil in her palms; the scent permeated the room. 

She began at my shoulders, gliding her hands down my spine, following the curve as it dipped down and then back up to the top of my ass.  Kneading, and circling her palms, she searched for areas of tightness to loosen.  As she worked her way from my neck down to my lower back, my breathing evened and I let go of my entire day, sinking deeper into the table.

Per our earlier conversation, she spent a good amount of time on my neck and my shoulders, which felt so good that it was impossible not to let out a little moan of pleasure and approval.  I felt a bit self-conscious about it, but somehow, it seem to encourage her.  She put a bit more pressure in to her movements, pushing her thumbs deep against my spine until they reached the lowest part of my back.  As was expected, this was the place that ached most for her attention.  It took very little time before her actions were eliciting from me sharp intakes of air and appreciative whimpers that, I'm sure, told her all she needed to know.  She moved lower still, no more than inches away from my anus.  The knots abounded here, and the feeling of pain and pleasure mixed enticingly, making it hard to stay still.

"Do you mind if I move on to the table, to help secure your position?" she said, in a buttery voice.

"That might help," I replied.  "This is the place it all seems to husband tries to rub them out, and it helps, but they keep coming back.  I have no idea what causes it."

"Let me know if the pressure is good, or if you want me to move.  I'll need you to move your arms up toward your head."

She placed her knee on the table and I felt a slight flush of air as her leg brushed over my head.  Her knees rested on either side of my torso, her thighs holding her hovering above my shoulders.  From here, she continued to push and prod her fingers all over my behind with intention.

As the tightness finally began to let go, she gracefully climbed back off of the table, hardly making a sound, and pulled the sheet over my back, covering my shoulders.  She peeled back the sheet from my leg, pulling it outward a bit to expose as much as she could while still allowing for my modesty.  I heard the tiny clank of bottles again as she poured more oil between her hands and rubbed them together.  She began at my calf, moved up to my knee, and then to the back of my leg.  Her fingers moved up underneath the sheet to the inside of my thigh, fingertips just brushing the edge of my labia.

Then the other leg...and just to the edge, once again.

Once she had finished my feet, she asked be to roll over on to my back.  She held the sheet and comforter up toward her, allowing me to twist around under cover without knotting the blankets up.  I situated myself, and she pushed the blanket back from my leg.  Again, the calf, the knee, the quadriceps, the inside of the thigh, and the hint of an intimate touch, held for just a moment longer.

Then the other leg...just to the edge, and then a pause.  Her fingers briefly traveled into the crevice between thigh and lip, small massaging circles, as if testing for a reaction.  I stayed still and moved my leg, just slightly outward in subtle encouragement.

Her slippery finger traced the outside of my shaved outer lips, upward...and then the inside, downward.  She may not have been able to tell, with her oiled fingers, that I was wet, and I tried very hard to remain still.  I didn't want to question why or what, just relish the moment, which was fleeting...leaving me with that sort of delicious disappointment that licks at ones deepest desires - teasing and torturing the lust to the surface.  The want that is not fulfilled.

She replaced the blankets and moved up above my head, sitting on a stool.  She peeled the comforter and sheet down to expose the just the upper swell of my breasts, and began pushing her fingers below my collar bone, to the indentation before my shoulder.  Both hands in sync on either side of my upper body, she worked several paths from my neck between, around, and above my breasts, just barely allowing the edges of her palms and the tips of her fingers to brush them.  On her final sweep upward, she let her hands graze my nipples, which were completely extended, sending gooseflesh down my entire torso, connecting one erotic zone to the other in a conversation of mutually unfulfilled hunger.

My arms, my hands, my head...

And she ended by holding her hands to my temples long enough for her heat to mix with mine, the pulse above my ears and the pulse in her fingers speaking a language only the body knows.  Wordless.

"Take your time getting dressed.  I look forward to our next appointment."  And she swept from the room.

As do do I. 

I have to admit, that while I definitely took liberty with reality here, all of this is based on true experience.  No, she did not actually touch any of my intimate places, though she came closer than most of my prior therapists.  And I do deride some sexual pleasure from this.  She did not straddle me, but she did place one knee on the table to ground herself and allow her to put greater pressure on my sciatic area.  Basically, every sexy part of this story was just one or two steps past the real experience.  I don't expect that it will ever reach the extent that I have drawn out here, but my mind can go there (which I promise you it will), with my eyes closed, senses overcome by herbal relaxants.

Tuesday, November 6, 2012

Wicked Wednesday: "Change"

This week’s Wicked Wednesday prompt is:

Age 10

Standing at the edge of the empty playground,
she whispered in my ear,
"He says you give him a boner."
I asked her what "a boner" was.
She said I made him "hard."
I asked her what that meant.
Her explanation caused roses to
bloom up the sides of my neck.

Age 13

We stood facing each other,
though I was at least 3 inches taller.
The only thought in my head was
"Please don't let our braces lock."

Age 16

He came all over the backseat of
my mother's car.
I spent 20 minutes at the carwash
trying to erase it.

Age 19

I laid a towel on the floor
and we made a bloody mess of it.

Age 20

Her black curls and
freckled cheeks
tightened my thighs
and made me question
my intentions.

Age 23

I was already bored,
but I was sure it was love.
I'd never known a man
to want it less than I could.

Age 27

I met my match.

Age 28

He asked me what I thought
about the prospect of
a threesome.
I giggled.

Age 29

He asked me what I thought
about the prospect of
I cried.

Age 30

We went to a club,
left our clothing and
our inhibitions
in the locker room.
we ascended the stairs to
a red velvet wonderland of
curtained beds,
writhing bodies,
and moaning lovers.

Age 31

I checked the box.
I checked the box.

Age 3__

I sit next to him on the couch,
our laptop screens glowing like two eyes,
showing us whatever version of
the world we seek.
I write a poem about sexual identity.
He researches the election.

My poem could suck.
The guy we didn't want could win.

We'll still have sex.
And that's the beauty of it.

Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Peaches and Gushing Orgasms


It sits alone, so ripe
I can smell its heavy sweetness.
I reach in and press the skin,
leaving an impression
too easily.

Carefully, I pick it up,
stretching my lips to take in
as much as my mouth will accept,
letting the juice gush down my chin
in slow syrupy rivulets.

When all that is left is the pit
and the mess, I gaze down at
nature's currency in my palm.
Wrinkled and hard,
this could still give life.

But, I throw it away
and wipe my face and hands.
A tidy end to the forgettable slaughter.
Yet, I can still smell its ghost
on my fingers.

Wednesday, June 27, 2012

e[lust] #37 (oops...I'm a bit late - vacation got in the way!)

Photo courtesy of Molly at Molly's Daily Kiss

Welcome to e[lust] - The only place where the smartest and hottest sex bloggers are featured under one roof every month. Whether you're looking for sex journalism, erotic writing, relationship advice or kinky discussions it'll be here at e[lust]. Want to be included in e[lust] #38? Start with the newly updated rules, come back July 1st to submit something and subscribe to the RSS feed for updates!

~ Top 3 ~

Coming to Terms with Being Gay - From the time I was seven I was raised Mormon, which meant I wasn�t allowed to have a girlfriend until I was 16 or to have sex until I was married.

What I Want - I want to be humiliated. Call me a slut. Call me a whore. Slap my face. Expose me.

Dinner Party Entertainment - At that moment, J's eyes went wide--he finally realized I was leaving him there, tied to the bed.

~ Featured Post (Picked by Lilly) ~

My Abstinence Only �Sex Education� - The speakers were a married, Christian couple, and the man told us about how he had pledged to stay a virgin until he was married.

~ e[lust] Editress ~

Your Crappy Writing Turns Me Off - Your written words are your clothes, your power, your voice, your facial expressions and that by which we measure intelligence, personality and even attractiveness.

All blogs that have a submission in this edition must re-post this digest from tip-to-toe on their blogs within 7 days. Re-posting the photo is optional and the use of the �read more�� tag is allowable after this point. Thank you, and enjoy!

Thoughts & Advice on Sex & Relationships

A New Found Respect for Bondage Educators
Cunt: Healing sexual abuse
Equal but Different
Fuck you. Without a condom
Harper Eliot's Guide to Surviving Drop Alone
PolyAnna's Musings: What About the Kids
Settling down--bullshit free

Sex News, Interviews, Politics & Humor

Sweet Valley High Meets the Story of Oh My!
Women's rape fantasies
Why May is Nat'l Masturbation Month

Erotic Writing

A Word on What Your Words Do to Me
Anything the Lady Wants
Cemetery Sex
Dropped Call
Fucking a Stranger�s Wife While He Watched
Folly, part 4
Getting His Attention
Jerk and Tug
Jill's Look Back at Masturbation Month
Like a Faggot
Phontographs (fiction, part 1)
Senses and Scents
Spearmint Rhino
Swing: Part I
The Dance
Touch Me, Tease Me

Kink & Fetish

Earning My Wings
fantasy with beast/the train ride
His first crop spanking
Learn the rope of knots: Larks Head
Popping my anal cherry
Stress Relief
Staying power
The Cutting Edge
Tie Me Up! ~ I think...
Why chastity is hot
What I Like and Why

Saturday, June 16, 2012

Photographs (fiction, part 3)

The next morning, Tanya made it to the bus stop even earlier than normal, having walked there quickly and with an uncharacteristic determination in her step.  It wasn't quite the expectation that she'd see him, or another photograph; she found herself feeling something she hadn't felt since she was a girl.  Hope.  Sheer, blind, disconnected hope.  Hope for something unknown.  That innocent desire that brings a flutter to the chest and a heaviness to the belly.  An anxious, slippery hope...which the bearer knows could just as easily turn to disappointment.  So tenuous.  So fragile.  So delicious.

Her gaze quickly flitted to the back of the bus when she boarded, and when she saw someone sitting in her normal seat, a man, with his head bent forward over a book, her breath faltered.  Could it be?

She made her way to the back slowly, both wanting and not wanting to find out.

The man didn't look up.  And since he was in "her" seat, on the aisle, she sat across from him, to his right, one row back.  She didn't want to appear too obvious, especially if it wasn't him.

She settled in and pulled out her book, not really intending to read.  She glanced frequently up at the man out of the corner of her eye.  His dark hair curled slightly around his ears and the back of his neck, appearing almost wet, as if he'd just taken a shower.  But it was combed cleanly, and his face was bare, perfectly smooth.  He looked young, mid to late twenties.  Crisp, white cuffs peeked out from beneath his navy blue suit coat.  Small, round, silver-rimmed cuff links and a silver, blue-faced watch.  Clean manicured nails.  Athletic hands.  She laughed at herself; what on earth were athletic hands?  Where had she come up with that?  Maybe she simply assumed that his slender fingers and build were those of a swimmer or a runner.  He was not a large man, but he surely had a presence.

The bus lurched to a stop.  Tanya instinctively and reflexively put a hand on the seat in front of her to keep herself steady.  The man collected his things and stood to exit the bus.  He looked at her briefly and smiled.

"Good day, madam."  His eyes sparkled, almost mischievously.  Or so it looked it to Tanya.

So formal and polite.  His posture rod-straight, his jaw sharp, his teeth white.

She felt herself become wet.  So wet, in fact, that she was a little afraid to stand up, for fear that she'd made a spot on the backside of her tan skirt.

"Good day," she replied to his back - her response almost too late.

He glanced back at her and winked.

Oh, shit, she thought, what am I going to do with this?  He's fucking beautiful.

She could not focus at work that day.  All she could think about was the picture she planned to take that night.  The photograph she planned to leave for him to find.  Game on.

Friday, June 1, 2012

Photographs (fiction, part 2)

The time at work couldn't pass fast enough, and as she half walked, half ran to meet her bus, she nervously considered taking a different route, to avoid any possibility of bumping into the stranger.  It was a strange feeling - wanting to confront him and wanting to avoid him at the same time.

When the bus rolled to a stop, the doors opened and passengers poured onto the sidewalk around her.  She waited until the entrance was clear and then ascended the three stairs, glancing skittishly to the back of the bus.  Her stomach tightened and released, expanding with a small pang of disappointment.  With the apprehension gone, she made her way more slowly than usual to the back of the bus, dropping into her seat to resume her novel, exactly where she left off.  She leaned to the side, reached into her bag, pulled out her book, opened it, and buried her nose in the pages.  But her focus was lacking.  It had been all day.  She leaned to the side, dropped her book into her bag, and leaned her head back against her seat, eyes closed, and sighed.  When she opened her eyes, still directed upward, she saw a black and white photograph taped to the ceiling of the bus, directly above her seat.  Her breath caught abruptly, and she nearly pulled a muscle as she whipped her head forward.  Looking around, eyes wide, like a cornered cat, she bit upper lip and nearly stopped breathing altogether.

What the fuck?  She thought.

Since she arrived at work early, she left early, which meant her ride home was much like her ride there - quiet and generally lacking in human presence.  This afternoon was no exception.  Grateful for the absence of an audience, she stood up, put one foot on the seat of the chair, steadying herself by grabbing onto the stanchion next to her seat.  She snatched the photo from the ceiling and dropped hurriedly back to a seated position, pulling her book back out in order to camouflage the photo within it.  Similar to the previous photo, it was of a naked man.  This time, full-light, face-showing, blatant and unabashed.  Somehow, the man in the photo was both vulnerable and confident, lips parted as if he were about to speak.  His eyes exuded heat and nearly burned a hole right through the paper and into Tanya's flesh.  She felt the blush rising from her chest, up her neck, exploding into full bloom on her cheeks.

For photo information, click here.

Good fucking Christ!  

She glanced up, like a scared rabbit or a deer in headlights - some sort of easy but quick prey.  Her eyes darted forward and side-to-side, making sure no one was watching.

It was, indeed, the man from this morning, as she had suspected.  But what on earth was he doing?  What kind of game was he playing?

She turned the photo over, an empty hope that the answer to her question would be emblazoned on the back.  But, nothing was there.  Just a blank and open space, sort of like her face at that instant.

When she made it home, she pulled out both photos and placed them next to each other on her kitchen counter.  She poured herself a glass of wine, a deep, dark, hot red she'd saved for years, hoping for just the right occasion.  This seemed like the moment...mired in utter confusion and uncontainable curiosity.  She felt just a little violated, but not enough to make her afraid.  Just enough to taunt a nervous hum under her skin, a vibrant energy, a growing hint of....Dare I admit it?...desire.

Elbows resting on the counter, she leaned forward, one hand around the stem of her glass.  She bent her thumb nail between her teeth and continued to gaze at the two photos.  They stirred something inside of her.  More than anything, it was the mystery that grabbed her.  Always a lover of the unknown, her incessant need to "find out" to "solve" made her a slave to the pictures in front of her.  They pulled her in, guiding her thoughts and her emotions, and eventually...her hand.  She let go of her glass, placed her palm on the edge of the counter as support, and with the other hand, lifted her skirt above her bare thigh.  She hated nylons, never wore them, and was thankful now for the easy access to her own flesh that their absence allowed.  Her eyes intently glued to the eyes of the man in the newest photo, she slipped her hand inside the crotch of her panties.  She was wet, and she wasted no time fooling around.  Never one for foreplay, she inserted one finger into her cunt.  Then two.  Working her fingers inside, the heel of her palm pressed hard against her clit, she tightened every muscle, from her ass to her toes, and came quickly.

It had been a long time since she'd pleased herself.  She'd forgotten how good it felt.

To be continued...

In my search for photographs for this post, I not only found amazing fodder for another post on "how to stop masturbating" (really...I'm not kidding...people think we should really be doing this!),  but I totally turned myself on perusing photos of women masturbating.  Good god women are sexy.  And with their faces contorted in ecstasy and their fingers buried deep between their legs -- need I say more?  It is now time for me to take care of my own needs.  I think I'll do it exactly the same way as Tanya (we'll call it "research").

(Some beautiful - copyrighted - photography of nude men...just as a bonus:  click here!)

Thursday, May 31, 2012


The sun's warmth stains the sheets.

It filters through the window,
caressing skin,
like the touch of a lover,
confident and prolonged.

He whispers heat across my face,
and tells me the time is coming
for him to rise above me,
the pleasure-burn on my skin,
red prints -
the marks of his bold touch.

Photographs (fiction, part 1)

Tanya was a pretty, yet plain woman.  The only thing that set her apart from the crowd was her hair -- a fiery orange-red and naturally curly.  She kept it long only because she had no other choice.  If she cut it, she'd be sporting an afro, which would look odd atop her 5'7", 140 pound, translucently pale and abundantly freckled frame.  She wore simple, dark clothing and avoided patterns, figuring her hair was resplendent enough.  Even her eyes seem to know better and kept themselves to a light gray most days.

She worked downtown as a legal secretary (not the kind you have an affair with, mind you).  Her organizational skills and attention to detail were unmatched, and while others seem to come and go like the daily news, Tanya had held her position for nearly 15 years.

She was single, by choice, having not yet met a man equal to her expectations.  Besides, she was shy and bookish and didn't get out much.

As she boarded the early bus, she glanced quickly to the back hoping to find her usual seat empty.  A creature of habit, she became nervous and agitated when things took a turn toward the unknown.  Luckily, her place was available, and she skittered down the aisle.  Few people took the bus this early.  She intentionally chose this time and route precisely because of that.

Settling into the red vinyl-covered seat, she pulled out her book -- a real-deal, hard-bound monster of a thing -- and began to read.

She was so engrossed in her novel that the bus's frequent stops and changing passengers remained a distant, ignorable non-event.

Tanya usually kept time by the sun.  A certain slant of light across the page let her know her stop was near.  Closing her book, and setting it in her lap, she noticed, for the first time, that a male passenger had taken the seat beside her.  Tanya found this odd, since the majority of the seats around her were empty.  The only other people on the bus were near the doors, prepared for a convenient and quick exit.

The man, in a grey suit and lavender striped tie, was thin and young.  His face was distinguished and clean-shaven.  Not a hair was out of place.  His manicured hands set lightly on his thighs, and his posture was perfect - erect.

Tanya tried to size the man up with a sideways glance, attempting to avoid eye contact and the possible conversation it could cause.  It wasn't that she was anti-social, but she disliked strangers and hated introductions.

The bus squealed to a stop and let out it's characteristic "shhhhh" as the doors opened to release her.  She stood, dropping her book on the floor.  The man bent so expeditiously that Tanya flinched upright to avoid the inevitable collision of heads or hands or some other part of her she was sure she didn't want touched.  He handed the book up to her with a simple, wordless smile.

"Thank you."  It came out as nearly a whisper, her voice still hoarse as she had not yet used it this morning.  She cleared her throat and repeated the obligatory response to his civil action, "Thank you."  Her eyes squinted and her lips pursed into the semblance of a smile.

Heaving her brown leather bag onto her shoulder, she weaved her way toward the door.  When she got there, she looked back to man.  With two fingers to his forehead, he offered her a friendly salute.  She nodded in acceptance and exited the bus, slightly annoyed that she'd bothered to glance back at all.

As she walked briskly along the heavily peopled city sidewalk, she looked down only long enough to slip her book back into her bag.  She noticed, however, a slip of paper edging out from the top of the book, like a bookmark -- something she never used because she always remembered exactly where she left off.  Slowing her pace and moving to the edge of the sidewalk nearest the buildings to avoid the mad dash of bodies, she opened the book.  It was a black and white, quite obviously professional, photo depicting a nude man reclined on a chaise lounge.  Taken aback by the discovery, Tanya nearly dropped her book...and the picture.  Instead, she slammed the book closed, the photo still inside, buried the book in her bag, flipped her hair out of her face, and continued on her way.  Quite humanly, and involuntarily, however, Tanya felt a nearly-forgotten tingle in her thighs which made her cheeks color.  It was a lovely pink blush that washed across her round, pale cheeks, and a very real sensation she hadn't felt since Jared had gone.

She had a quite solid suspicion that the man in the photo was the man on the bus.  She hadn't looked long enough or closely enough to tell, and the man in the photo had his head turned into the shadows, making it difficult to be sure.

How very odd, she thought to herself, her brow furrowing and her face scrunching up in confusion.

When Tanya finally removed her coat and settled in to her deliciously comfortable and ridiculously expensive leather office chair, she slipped her hand into her bag, retrieving the photograph.  Nervously, with the erratic movement of a bird, Tanya opened her top drawer and placed the photo inside, facing up.  This gave her the ability to look at the photo and remove it from sight at the slightest noise without appearing too guilty about her actions.

The man was thin, but muscular, holding himself up on his left elbow and looking upward.  The light, which appeared to be a ray of sunshine, spotlighted his body, leaving his face shielded by the dark.  His body was turned toward the camera, his left leg flush with the chair and extended...his right leg bent, knee pointing up, his left forearm resting on top of it.  Between his legs, impossible to ignore, was his erect penis, his testicles seated on his left thigh.

The photo was crisp, the blacks and whites and grays clearly delineated.  It wasn't taken by an amateur.  And it didn't look like the first time this man had posed.

Is it him?  She wondered.  And if it is, why?  Why do I have it?  Did he put it in my book?  Why on earth would he do that?  Even more strangely, If he didn't put it there, who did?  How did it get there?

Artist:  Michael Meyersfeld "Deceit"

(So, I'm just getting started it something I should continue?  I'm not married to it, but the characters intrigue me.  I'm not even sure I know where this is going yet, and I know very little about the man.  I could easily flesh this out - but I wonder, would anyone read it?  Am I taking too much time with the set up?  Not enough?  The ideas are there...maybe more photographs?)